ehehehe

mum was looking over my shoulder watching me apply for a job at a new stationery store 
and i was talking about how i loved stationery and all (tru dat; a little bit obsessed with buying notebooks and then writing as little in there as humanely possible) and mum was like “why do you like stationery?” and i’m like “i think i like paper” and then mum was like “yeah, you got that from your father” and told me about how when i was little i used to grab books and newspapers whenever i saw them lying around and pretend to read them, except obviously i didn’t know how to read it yet because if it didn’t pictures i could look at i would put them back, except i might have accidentally taught myself to recognise numbers in this way, because i could read numbers. and whenever we went to the local hospital for a check up the nurses and doctors would love me because i was chubby (i am still chubby now but that gets tiring after a while) and wouldn’t mind whenever i snatched paper out of their hands. and whenever i started crying, the only way my mother could get me to stop was to sing a numerical alphabet song that started at 1 and finished at 0 (only my mother) only she couldn’t ever stop singing it once she’d started or i’d begin crying again. “numbers and paper, that’s what you liked.” this explains why i’m so shitty at maths now